Out of all the posts I have ever written, this one has been the most difficult. I write and teach from the trenches of my own struggles and victories. Most of my battles are fought in my mind. It is on the battlefield that fiery missiles of weakness, fear, addiction, and living like my past is always going to overshadow my future, are launched at the core of my heart. Satan’s a great shot. You see, there comes a time when you have to deal. You can ignore the past, all those things you did or didn’t do, maybe your parents divorced early on like mine did, or maybe you are a victim of sexual abuse, this life is full of horrific situations. I don’t know what you’ve endured, or what you hide behind your smile. I hid so much behind two coats of mascara and Cover Girl that I had a mask for every day of the week. But the time will come, when there’s no stopping it from surfacing. Maybe you’re there right now.
Some of us have a past worse than others. Yours could be that you grew up in a wonderful home. Even though my parents were divorced, they both still loved me very much; I didn’t have a bad childhood. However, from an early age, I had issues with self-esteem and lived in fear of everything. I struggled with relationships and would analyze what others would ‘like’ me to be so that I could fit the mold. I struggled with who the real me was for years. My husband has been married to so many different Shana’s that even I wonder which one is his favorite. Smiling.
When the Lord was preparing me for ministry, I had to deal. Like I said before, Satan knew my past. He had walked along side me all those years, watching, taking strategic note of my strengths and weaknesses. He has been doing the same thing with you too. It wasn’t until I took a step of faith and asked Jesus into my heart, that Satan decided to launch a full on war on my mind. It was subtle at first and then he sent an army after me. I have a feeling you know exactly what I am talking about.
Over the last few years, the Lord has dealt with me on my thoughts and words. Negative thoughts produce negative words. I found that I was given the gift of righteous anger. It took me some time to put a name on it. I began to see all the places that the enemy was using to produce fear, stress, low self-esteem, and addictive behaviors. I built an arsenal of Scripture to fire back at the enemy’s army. To my own surprise, I began to see victory after victory. It has been through this process that I am with the HOLY SPIRIT winning the battles one by one. In part two, I would like to introduce you to some ways that I have gotten closer to Jesus. How that I am digging deeper into the truths of Scripture so that you can live stronger in Christ too.
That’s what LIVE STRONG MINISTRIES is all about. It’s an individual’s journey to living stronger and finishing well. Stay tuned for Part Two.
WARNING: This is not a method; this is a relationship with Jesus Christ. There is no amount of self-talk or feel good quotes of the day here. Please understand my heart; I do not want to mislead you. This took years of tears, gut-wrenching confessions, leaning into Sisters in Christ that were safe, and all the while my precious husband and children had to endure the craziest parts of me. But now, they get the best of me..